Taking Time Out

27.11.14


I hope this blog post today is worth writing, and not only helps me to lift a weight off my chest, but something you guys might relate to. Or, I could just end up losing a few readers. (Sorry if you dislike what I put) Recently, I've been feeling overwhelmed with everything. Be it Sixth Form, where I'm going to end up, my friends stressing about UCAS and about myself. (Though I do admit that when I went to the Skills London event Saturday, I felt uplifted, but I've gone downhill again) Why am I telling you this exactly? Well, I generally feel supported by all of you whenever I do a blog post on lifestyle - take the 'How To Live Your Life (And Forget About The Rubbish Stuff)' post for example. About 40 of you read it and it's one of my most popular posts. Not bad for a small blog. But really, I just need to write it all down, I hope it helps and what I write you might relate to or have any tips to overcome it. So here goes...

I've told my parents how I feel, and my close friends, but I feel like I'm in dark hole and when someone says something positive to me I can get out but it's like losing my grip and I fall back down. (Nice imagery there for you) I don't know if you guys have been through something similar, but Sixth Form is stressing me out, especially English Lit. I feel like I can't do it, even if I'm near the grade I want, so I basically feel like a failure. And I can't talk to my teachers about it. I don't feel myself anymore and it's getting to me, I know the reason why I'm feeling like this partly, but in recent weeks or even days it's like it's getting worse.

That's when it got a bit too much yesterday, I closed myself in and left early at break close to tears with no particular reason. I passed my friend after the day ended and rushed to Starbucks. How did that help exactly? Well, I got a hot chocolate and read Girl Online which I got the day before - I'll do a review on that Saturday. I stayed there for about an hour sipping my drink and reading about 30 pages. I felt calmer and less panicked and by the time I got home I was in the mood for a bath. Yup, a Lush bath with my Holly Golightly bubble bar and it was bliss aahh.

I know this seems quite a personal post, but I'm not telling you all the details, but in summary, I just feel the same. Even with the comforting words of my friends, I feel lifted - like a firework display and then it fades into nothing. Yesterday's trip to my second home helped immensly and I would do it again to zone out what's going on in my life. Though it can't fully get rid of it. For now, I'm just going to have to hold my tongue and get through it because it might be because it's the stage of my life when I'm ready for change and to get out of education - I just don't know.

If you feel like this, or similar do try it, it helps. This one tip might be partly the answer. A book is another world you can get sucked into that won't remind you of your own. Or if you don't like coffee, or you're broke, just sit in your room without distractions and read. Maybe I should do something like Little Miss Katy, and do a happy things post every week so I can see the good things in life. Also, if you have any tips or suggestions, do comment below and I promise tomorrow's post will be more cheerful. I just wanted to get this off my chest and see what you guys think.

If you read this far, thank you and I am forever grafeful that I have readers as nice as you. I know I'm taking a risk hitting the publish button, but I just hope it's worth it.

Au revoir xx

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8 comments

  1. Oh sweetie <3

    I know it all seems to doom and gloom, but I promise you WILL get through this! Is there a particular reason you can't talk to your teachers? Or are you just afraid to let them know you're struggling?

    I struggled in my college years, because I went from flying by with everything to suddenly being bought down to earth with a bump by failures in two subjects. I spoke to my teachers about it and realised that I didn't have a routine in place for studying. I wasn't very disciplined because I'd always been able to get away with good-ish marks. My teachers helped me figure out a basic schedule and were always available after that for me to have a chat with if I felt over-whelmed.

    Don't forget that a problem shared is a problem halved :)

    And YES definitely start a Happy Moments even if it's just a list for yourself, and you don't post it online. The thought of it will help you become more aware of how you're feeling and help you establish yourself in the present moment when you're feeling good :)

    I hope you feel better soon lovely!!! <3

    Little Miss Katy | UK Lifestyle Blog

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    1. Thank you so much for this and I might actually start the series. My school is a little weird and if I tell them I'm struggling I'm afraid they might kick me out of the subject, which I think they did with one of my friends but I'm not sure. :/ And I feel I can't approach any of my teachers about it. But thank you for the comment, it means a lot honestly. xx

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  2. I've been there, trust me. I went to a super academic school and there was always this intense pressure to do well, that it almost felt like someone had thrown me into a swimming pool and I was flailing around hopelessly.

    It gets easier, things are just very overwhelming now. Now I'm at my uni, things are much less intense and more chilled. I used to agonise over english and history essays, and staying up late and constantly changing them to be better, but you've just got to have confidence in yourself x

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    1. yeah, I think it's partly due to my English coursework and I honestly feel glad I'm not alone because I feel like the only one in my school that's stressed but I'm probably not.

      I just can't wait to leave and get an apprenticeship, thanks for the comment. xx

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  3. I actually just did a kind of similar post to this a few days ago! I've been where you are, my last year of high school was the worst. It was all so overwhelming and all I wanted to do was graduate and get out of there. That was already almost 2 years ago (wow ok now I feel old). It passes so quickly, just take everyday as it comes. I know exactly what you mean about the 'firework display', you feel a bit uplifted for a bit and then you go back to how it was, because nothings really changed.

    Even if it feels like your world is closing in, and sixth form is all you ever know, it's not forever. You'll get past it and realise how small it was, compared to the rest of things.

    The happy post sounds like a great idea! You'll feel better soon, and things will get easier. I still remember the day I finished high school, oh my god, cannot explain the freedom I felt haha.

    You have some of the best years ahead of you and the best days of your life haven't happened yet. You have sooo much to look forward to, just keep your head up! :) xx

    Angela | The Sunday Chapter

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    1. thank you so much for this, and I'm ready to let the last six months fly by because I'm ready for the change. Also I love your blog! xx <3

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  4. Hopefully it gets better and always remember, unless it is a life, it is nothing ;)

    http://iwish-zuzi.blogspot.co.uk/

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Thank you guys for all your lovely, I love to read and reply to them all! :) xx

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